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Hard To Find.

The bigger it becomes the harder it is to control right. It's a situation that's all too familiar, curled up in bed crying into a pillow because you couldn't face the light of day, people's actions confused you despite the good nature based behind them. You second guess yourself and wonder why, you try placing positive before negitive but still, somehow, one plus one equals zero. 
Inflicted repercussions by people are the battle, self inflicted repercussions are the enemy and knowing how to tame yourself is the greatest challenge of all. 

When you become engrossed in the emotion, self pity becomes second nature, fools warmth & natures correst feels all too overwhelming to comprehend as, for some it's too much of what they hope yet they can't break the cycle enough to believe it. 

This isn't the voice of someone who's self inflected negative emotions have become reality, if anything it's purely reflective and outwardly seen by my own eyes for the harsh reality of life takes it's toll on many unsuspecting minds, some who are all too familiar with the situation yet quite nights welcome they're heavy heads - silence keeps them at bay, bottled up emotions become second nature and yet, they still search for answers. 

*
Ruin it all she said, hiding out in trenches of deeply dug emotional dunes, perception is a tricky idealistic view yet reality harshly bites against the dream your engrossed in. 

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