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Peoples Perception.

I watched a very interesting TED talk about peoples perception on the time of change, or as the title was " the psychology of your future self".  

It was fascinating to me because it explained the dynamics we as people change in, the time formats we believe we change and the actual reality of such change. 
Now while writing this, I'm sitting on my bed in Berlin, drinking a Pilsner and procrastinating about everything that's been created here. 

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"Do you know where you will be in ten years?" Is one question asked in the TED talk, yet while people assume they know or would like to have some understanding we simply don't; we believe we will be the same person, that our perception of reality won't shift all that much in the time frame, that we will continue to grow and develop on the road we're on, right? I somehow have chosen to ignore such questions lately, because my perception of reality shifts daily, the change inside me being here is beyond my ideas, and yet it's constant. 

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It's funny when I think back to before I relocated, I remember folding a table in work and suddenly utter fear hit me, teary eyed I ran to a dear friend who reassured me that after everything, this was the right decision. 
Now granted it's been a quick few months, yet suddenly, settling is what it feels like. 

Setting yourself on fire, burning the man who once looked at you in the mirror who said "No", who belittled you're mind frame to nothing, seeing him gone, is almost brand new. 

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I felt sorry lately, for the unknown pain I've caused, for the unknown confusion and the unknown steady foundation, yet while I lay here, sipping my beer I don't bask, I don't call out for love, I hold it tight somehow hoping that the light will reach us poor souls. 

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The hardest thing in life is change, be prepared to suffer it's anguish, be prepared to fall when it shakes yet be prepared to bask in it's glory too; we all want what we can't have, we want only the now of our perception with that, the important shifts and we loose sight sometimes, but I suppose that's the flip side right ? 

Finally, I think it's safe to say I'm happy, I'm challenged in every aspect right now, my mid twenties mind has been blown a sunder to the life here, yet my morals stay strong and my heart lives on. 

Embrace the ever changing current dear friend, it's only a shift of perception. 

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