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Salt water spring time.

It's true what they say, it's like loosing a member of your family and even harder at times.
The first person who outside of your family you share your whole life with and more, it's hard to adjust to a sudden death but when they still live in a world your no longer welcome in, death sounds promising.

*
It happens to all of us at one time or another, a simple break up.
I recall everything from all my break ups yet somehow this longing for something more powerful and fulfilling still has me in its grips.

Its not like before, my heart is settled in the comforts of home, the comforts I've found in my solitude and I'm happy for the most part.
I love everything I've built since, everything I've gained and everything I've lost, just like before there's another I try to admire still, yet that love no longer presides inside my heart too.

*
I remember the day well, I took the tram to Gleneg, it was a beautiful day with the temperature reaching around 39 degree's. I wore a tank top and shorts and put on smile on my face even though I was hopeless.
I walked along the white beach that day, looking out at the ocean and thinking of the life I've left behind and everything I've gambled.

After sitting on the beach till sundown I left and went home, with a smile of my face for I found peace within myself.

*
As the cold air slowly warms again I'm starting to see that change again.
Its lonely, cold and abusive sometimes, but a battle I'm winning.
The changing current is once again in my stride, the changing dynamic of a life I once was is no longer.
Simple days are a blessing and yet there are so few.

I don't mourn anymore and I don't cry.

Hello spring. 

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