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(Can of) Worms.

As I endlessly searched the streets to find his address I thought "what are you doing? you can bail now, no one will know, it's fine, do it", but I didn't.

I sought out his apartment only promising myself not to sleep with him, only enjoy the company for we know full well what we are.

While we sat there chatting over the dialogue in the movie I couldn't help but feel powerless...so I drank.
We polished of a bottle of white quickly enough, then before long we moved on to the rose.
As the sweetness of the wine hit my lips and taste buds I could only think of the past romances we had.

While chatting I got up and walked to the window to finish my cigarette, all I could think was what's going to happen, will anything happen?
Laugher filled the room when the twist reviled itself in the movie.
All these questions, I fell as though I'm punishing myself with, I needed to relax and enjoy what this was or in fact what this is, a night in with an ex and a bottle (or two) of wine.
Something so familiar, something so fascinating for I can't recall such vivid times as my mind is waging a war over the ghost of the recent past.

As I left, he a true gentlemen walked me out.
We chatted and while I suddenly felt awkward about this situation he asked me, "why didn't anything happen, I thought you were going to make a move?"
I hesitated in my head, I honestly couldn't answer his question knowing this was it.

In the end we kissed.
Remembering those lips took time, remembering those movements took time.
While I walked I smiled for I now know my can or worms is open and I can't take it back.

I'm pushing the past further and future away, only rejoicing in the present and the soil I feed off.

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