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Hold your devil.

He's brought me on an endless journey of self discovery.
To discover my faults, discover my life and without knowing it discovering my desperate past and questioning everything I've ever done and said.

It took me over two years to crawl out of my desperate pitt of self pity, questioning my worth and questioning my life.
My finger nails shattered as I dug the dirt out from under me, they bled to the bone in pain as I pushed all my energy to dig towards the light, which I did.

The questionable past I have is somewhat a mystery as to why it occurred but it did anyway, I don't blame myself or anyone for it's ever exestice, I only hope to be brave enough not to withdraw into such a crevice.

I can't distinguish the difference between sex and making love.
I don't want sex, I want love with you.
I miss our movements, our starters middles and ends.
The joy and love I felt knowing I've let myself go to you, letting you enjoy my pure body fuelled with love for another of this kind.

"I want to be held by those arms" -but it will never happen.

The sweet music I choose to die to has me in a trance of pure questionable actions and questionable memories.

We once loved, we once trusted and we once were amazing.
To ask is simply childish and I can't bear to hear myself ask.

I guess this is it, this road I've preached about is truly mine and mine alone, my bicycle cycles down an endless road, endless folk fills my heart with a smile of a recognition.

"Honey I'm going your way" -in limbo we may meet again and ignore the face the haunts our dreams.

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