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The travel bug.

The tb is back.

That travel bug that once consumed me and made me live for adventure, I remember booking my flights, visa's and hotels and slowly counting down each month, each week then each day until I left.
Excitment filled my body but also sorrow and heart ace because as I went on this great adventure of self discovery, you were kept here, chained by the rules and regulations of life.

One could say it didn't work out, but we made it.
We came out the other end, came out better people and stronger but somehow, somewhere we fell apart.

Lately I've been thinking about travelling. It all started a few weeks ago when I heard some amazing news, finally the wedding of two amazing people will take place in my second home, my second home some Ten thousand miles away.

"I can go for just over two weeks max" I said but in hindsight why go so far for so short a time period? and  then it started, tb is dangerous bug the inflicts self doubt and harrows the lines of reality.

I left once before, only too happy to walk into the sunshine b and embrace it but I always looked back, which was my down fall.
This time I wont do that.
I don't regret a single decision I made by leaving or going, I only wish I pushed myself more, more for money, more for confidence and more for me.

I'm thinking south America, a completely foreign country filled with beaches and sunsets, thousands of years of history over shadowed by a great forest and a vast new civilisation, one in which I'm totally intrigued by. Then west over the ocean to somewhere closer to home and family, my second family.
Then north way over the horizon then west and slowly make my way home, but when I'm ready to come home.

It's a plan, only pushed more so by your absence, the absence of a love that has no strings in my life.

It funny how things work out.
There's nothing left here, nothing but blood and concrete, alone I stand facing the world.

Alone.

Comments

  1. PinkStarMay 8, 2011 at 12:36 AM

    do it!

    ReplyDelete
  2. AbluebouquetMay 25, 2011 at 5:51 PM

    To do so now would be a mistake.
    A mistake of my hardship ,its paying off -the road I've traveled to get here.
    Here is me with my skills not my shattered life.

    ReplyDelete

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